Blackout period is OVER, Y’ALL! You might wanna switch over to Google + for the next couple of weeks – things are about to get horrifically real. Nobody is safe.
The official Liberty Launch LAUNCH 2016 Facebook page has been…launched, and the branding is fun. Rocket Man is my second favourite Elton John song, after Bennie and the Jets. The page also reveals a new hashtag, #redarmy – definitive proof that, after extensive consultation with dictionary.com, someone on the campaign team has mastered the accepted English usage of the word ‘irony’.
The STAR page is the same as previous years, which means they’ve kept all of those valuable likes. They’ve gone with a sort of 90s Word Art vibe for their 2016 branding, what with the 3D shooting star and everything. I dunno. It’s fine. https://www.facebook.com/staruwa?fref=ts
For whatever reason, no policies are announced on the first day of campaigning. Photographs of the candidates are all that the prospective voter has to go on right now – and, realistically, what they’ll keep going on, even when the party platforms are made known.
We can’t find any Left Action or Birthday Party social media presences as of yet, which really endears them to us.
This is a very space themed guild election. One could labour the metaphors. Stars tend to stay pretty high up there in the sky no matter what happens, whereas rockets do, um, tend to crash and burn a lot of the time. Often before exiting the earth’s atmosphere. This one looks pretty sturdy, though – more Columbia than Challenger. That’s about as far as I’m willing to scroll down the NASA Wikipedia page in the name of student journalism. Moving on.
If you’re looking for a LAUNCH sports rep candidate, you’re looking in vain – the campaign team stuffed up big time, and didn’t submit the nomination form to the Electoral Commission properly. It was apparently Milan Vaswani who missed out, and to be honest in a few days I’m sure a number of candidates will be wishing they were in his lucky position. Milan, I’ve just looked you up on Facebook, and you seem chill. Trust me, this is the best thing that could possibly have happened to you.
More than a few hacks have sent us Facebook messages calling Pelican out on these posts. I really cannot stress this enough: if you are in any way affiliated with guild politics, this blog ain’t for you. This blog is for the students who have to put up with guild politics – who are having two weeks of their lives disrupted with flyers, speeches, Facebook messages, incoherent yelling, and screenshot wars. Student unions are great! Student union elections are unpleasant. This blog exists not to publish the tiny petty details, but to try and ease the pain a little. Also, to help Lucy and me get jobs at Junkee.
The next couple weeks are going to be intense. Put on the Fleetwood Mac and get ready for some rumours. As usual, email your thinly veiled agendas to [email protected].
Words by Kat Gillespie
PS: This gem just arrived in our inbox – make of it what you will:
Subject: SHOUTING MATCH IN THE TAV
So, I was sitting in the Tavern at around 3:15pm. Max Riley, Tom Beyer and Emily Harrison were in a corner by the Breathalyser having an angry and loud conversation. I think a few FACSOC people were there as well looking alarmed. They all ended up storming off after about 10 minutes and Beyer looked pissed.