Egg, Inc

I was under the impression that the egg farming industry was a blight on humanity, evidence of our callous willingness to enslave other living creatures and therefore unsuitable for a benevolent tap game. Apparently not. Be prepared to spend quadrillions of egg dollars to provide your fictional slave chickens with the most comfortable of residences.

Stand O’ Food 3

Fulfil your lifetime fantasy of becoming a fast-food employee! But without the pay or social interaction. Less greasy though.

Plants v. Zombies 2

This game is free and doesn’t relentlessly try to make you spend money, which I appreciate. This game is the best.

Super Mania 2

By the geniuses who brought you the critically acclaimed Stand O’Food series comes the sequel to Super Mania, Super Mania 2! Let your imagination run wild as you stock shelves and serve customers in a supermarket. I love this stupid game.

Cooking Mama

A classic of the tap game genre which is way more difficult than you’d think. You can’t count yourself a pro tap-gamer until you’ve tried Cooking Mama and then deleted it pretty quickly because it requires too much dexterity.

Neko Atsume

No tap game listicle would be complete without the inclusion of this quintessential time waster and strangely meditative Tamagotchi-esque whimsical treat. Added bonus: now in English so I’m less confused about what’s going on.

Pocket Mortys

Is Rick and Morty hilarious? Or does it suck? Has everyone forgotten about it anyway? Does it make sense for it to be combined with Pokémon-red/blue/yellow era gameplay?

1010!

This game emulates everything we have to fear from tap games. Prepare to lose hours of your life.

Words by Martha Wood, art by Danyon Burge

This article first appeared in print volume 88 edition 3 SOAP