You probably know someone who curates their own meme page, holding up an example of 10 likes on a post as proof of their comedic genius. But it takes a certain kind of talent to gain wide scope of traction, which brings me to one of Perth’s best upcoming meme pages.
Created in February this year, Perth Snowstorm Warnings makes it their daily mission to be there for the people of Perth, to ensure they are safe from any oncoming blankets of white powder. The Weather Department of Pelican got in contact with the admin of the page to find out more.
Why did you create the page?
To save lives. The suicide rate in Western Australia is 14.4 per 100,000. Given Perth has over 1.6 million people, that’s 230 suicides a year. Now, they’re probably not ALL due to fear of snowstorms, but even if only 90% of them are, that’s 200 lives. Add that to about 160 road deaths a year in WA (largely due to snowstorm induced panic), and you quickly see the importance of the work I do.
Then you have to think about an actual snowstorm. DFES (editor: Department of Fire and Emergency Services) get an enormous budget annually, but for some reason a Perth Metro Area snowstorm isn’t the kind of ‘emergency’ they bother preparing for. A big enough snowstorm could potentially wipe out 90% of Perth, if the movie “The Day After Tomorrow” is anything to go by.
Also the ABC get an enormous budget, but never warn Perth citizens about snowstorms.
Why snowstorms in particular?
I don’t understand the question.
Paint us a picture of the person behind the page
Honestly, I’m probably the second most beautiful person to ever live.
Who’s the first?
The girl reading this.
Would you ever branch off into other kinds of weather?
No, of course not.
How would you describe your relationship with weatherpeople and the Bureau of Meteorology?
Please. They’re all paid off by Big Snowstorm. I wouldn’t listen to a word they say.
What would you say to the Snowstorm Lovers in Perth?
Edward Snowed-in and I used to be great friends, and he even helped build the Snowstormometer. I have nothing to say to him now that he has turned to a life of evil.
How do you create engaging content on a daily basis?
If I don’t, people die. It’s not hard to find inspiration.
Is the page really just a conspiracy to subconsciously remind people about global warming?
Absolutely not. Global warming would be great, as it would significantly reduce the chance of snowstorms.
Have you got something special prepared for the day that there is a snowstorm in the Perth CBD?
Depends whether you consider your only chance of surviving to be ‘special’. To me, a warning is very special.
What is something you would like to say especially to UWA students?
We must secure the existence of our people and a future for Perth’s children.
And there you have it. Perth Snowstorm Warnings, saving Perth citizens one warning at a time. Go like their page to stay informed!
Thomas Coltrona