I have as many problems with student politics as anyone else on campus. It’s only week 6 and I’m already done with this shit. It hasn’t even really started but I’m already over it.
But, you know what I do love? Music. Due to my sub-editorial obligations I have to have some role in covering Guild politics, so here we are. Forget the policies, forget the banter, forget the ballots. It’s time for the candidates to face their music and I’m going to judge the hell out of it. For the record anyone with the word, “vibes” in a playlist title has been automatically penalised.
For the past few weeks I’ve been following their Spotify playlists, tracking their listening in Excel spreadsheets and scoured through their musical ‘likes’ on Facebook. And now I am finally ready to deliver my verdict. A preference list of candidates you should vote for purely based on their musical taste. Just a side note, it was really hard to critique what was essentially two thirds of people only listening to music in the Triple J hottest 100 from the past three years.
29) Lincoln Aspinall – STAR Ed Council Pres
Look, at first, I was going to put you in a default last place because I could find NOTHING about your music taste or just your online presence AT ALL. However, I got intel from a very reputable source that Lincoln, and I quote, “only listens to Post Malone…he even went to the concert”. And for that, you remain last.
28) Pheobe Burrage – LEFT ACTION SOC
You had both no Spotify account or music likes on Facebook, but you still rank above Lincoln “I only listen to Post Malone” Aspinall.
27) Nisa Shahrin- STAR ISS Director
The only thing I have to say is I just don’t know why half of your playlists don’t have any songs in them.
26) Jade Mawby- LEFT ACTION Pres. Candidate
I mean you’ve really got nothing in your music likes except a local jazz band that doesn’t exist anymore and a page about puns.
25) Dan Kuzich- STAR Sports Rep
Again, couldn’t find much on this dude. However, what I could find on his Facebook just indicated “likes” for multiple Chester See and Ryan Higa music pages. I assume these choices were made around 2012. In addition to that include a page called ‘techno’, one called ‘hip hop music’ and an unofficial Kanye West page. Nothing much to see here folks.
24) Jessica Joseph- LEFT ACTION PAC
Jessica’s Music likes on Facebook only consist of WASO, Ed Sheeran, Lorde, Kendrick Lamar, Birdy, and Taylor Swift proving she hasn’t listened to any music beyond 2012. Except for Halsey, but just because an artist chain smokes doesn’t mean they can sing.
23) Anaiya Dabasa- LAUNCH Women’s Officer
From what I could source form your online presence, your musical likes include, “RnB Fridays, Hit 92.9 and Shaggy”. Radio stations are not musical acts. But at least you have a vested interest in hip hop/ RnB. So that’s something I guess?
22) Caleb Holmes- LEFT ACTION Sport Rep
The only interesting thing about your Facebook music likes is the Christian Pop and Rock page.
21) Adhish Kastha- STAR Gen. Sec
Adhish, I’m not angry, just confused. From what I could find from tracking your Spotify listening habits you went from everything from heavy EDM to Blackbear to The Vamps? Hun? What is UP with that? There was also some Katy Perry in there?! (Dude side note PRISM was her worst album). Also, a quick look at your Facebook page musical likes seems to indicate the bulk of your taste has not matured past 2009. I hope it gets better.
20) Brielle Cain- LEFT ACTION Welfare Officer
All Brielle’s likes are is just generic triple j, Australian hip hop and too many One Direction pages for someone to have at this point in time.
19) Sharon Ndjibu- LAUNCH Ed. Officer
I didn’t really hate anything here, but I didn’t LOVE anything either. Just your standard Beyonce, Little Mix (who make good pop music @ me) and a smattering of local and generic electronic music artists and Djs. Very indifferent, very generic, kind of boring. Next please.
18) George Tubron- LAUNCH Sports Officer
I don’t know about this one. Nothing special about a music taste which is semi- exclusive to majority Top 40 artists from 2015/16. I will give props to some of the local stuff (eg. Cloning the Mammoth). Also, Bananas in Pyjamas isn’t a musical act why is it in your music likes on Facebook.
17) Nicole McEwen- LEFT ACTION Ed Council
Your playlists are either very sad music or smooth jazz that isn’t really smooth jazz but more the kind of jazz you’d hear in a fish and chip shop that wants to appeal to the most common denominator. However, while the sad playlists are sad, they aren’t too bad. Would recommend to listen to only when you need a good cry. (Updated from Nicole McEwan, formal apology extended to Ms McEwan, whoever you may be.)
16) Krisen Shah- LAUNCH Environment Officer
Again, here I have a bad case of the little to no online presence. But what I did find was some RnB and Hip Hop heavy content. I kind of wish I could see your Spotify we probably have the same music taste. Hit me up for some recommendations.
15) Bradan Sonnendecker- LAUNCH Gen. Sec.
I don’t think anything proves you’re more of a bnoc if half of your playlists are specifically made for Uni related events. A lot of your standard party playlists here, nothing too out of the ball park. Kind of indifferent to this one.
14) Suchi Kalia- ISS Director
Okay, damn girl. I want to talk about one playlist in particular. Out of the three public playlists you have, the one you seem to listen to the most regularly, titled “Play It”, is a wild ride. More than half of the playlist is just songs from either the Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack or Magic Mike XXL. The rest of it is just full of certified baby making jams. Major respect for that, girl. You go get it. As for the rest of your profile, it’s not too bad, some good hits here and there. But again, I was left wanting a bit more.
13) Hinako Shriashi- STAR SOC
From what I gather from your recent playlists is that you mainly listen to musical soundtracks? Like that’s it? I respect loyalty to the genre it but damn (shout-out to the Avenue Q soundtrack, though). I mean, your playlist “Old Person Party” has some diversity to it but it’s mainly super campy pop songs (which is so fine). I will say, people who listen exclusively to musical theatre are usually all sunshine and rainbows. So, take that as you will. Also, I guess shout-out to the playlist you made for me though that just consists of the song “You’re The Best,” by Joe Esposito from Karate Kid.
12) Conrad Hogg- STAR Pres. Candidate
First off, no one needs to listen to Adele that many times. I also have grave concerns for people who just dump every song they listen to into one ginormous 49-hour playlist. Please fix that up. Not sure how to feel about the playlist, ‘indie/folk/alternative’. I’m just not sure if the Vance Joy discography is in the realm of alternative anymore. Your ‘pres’ playlist is good, could use with some expansion and diversity in genres in my opinion. Additionally, any 2000s playlist needs more artists in it than just Avril Lavigne. But on the whole, there’s some alright stuff in that 49-hour monstrosity of a playlist.
11) Maddie Hedderwick- STAR Welfare Officer
Maddie’s Spotify is what I like to call, “semi-generic indie”. While similar to that of those mentioned before, I can appreciate the smattering of some classic early 00s pop-soul and RnB deep cuts. I don’t know, I feel hopeful about this one. Also, your Mum’s playlist is pretty cute.
10) Kate Fletcher- LAUNCH Pres. Candidate
The overall impression I got from Kate’s Spotify profile was that she doesn’t listen any bands that wouldn’t be on a potential Splendour in the Grass line-up. The playlist ‘Fun Bands’ reads like a set list for a slightly above average Falls line-up. It feels like someone who makes playlists in a desperate attempt to learn a bands entire musical profile RIGHT before a festival. I also don’t feel too good about the playlist made up of the entirety of John Mayer’s discography.
9) Bre Shanahan- STAR Women’s Officer
On the whole, Bre’s musical habits are to a similar tune to that of Kate’s. However, I appreciate how there is a little more diversity in the artists (especially the local stuff). I also noticed that Bre listens to a lot of classical piano instrumentals, so that’s something I can also get on board with. However, a playlist I noticed Bre frequented a fair bit was titled ‘SAD RAP SONGS <3”.
It’s alright, Bre. We’ve all been there xx
8) Khyl Hardy- LEFT ACTION Environment Officer
You have a lot of what I guess some people would call “important” music. Mainly stuff like NWA’s greatest hits, A.B Original and System of a Down. The playlist called ‘political’ kind of proves my point. I mean most of the stuff you have here is metal and heavy-ish rock which is so not my jam, so I can’t really judge without bias here. Well to be fair, I’ve been doing that this whole piece. So in that case, your taste sucks.
7) Clare Francis- LEFT ACTION Women’s Officer
I very much appreciate the Vampire Weekend love here. Also, you do have little pockets of more underground acts (eg. Life in Film and Bad Bad Hats) which is very lovely. I can see you really do love the bright poppy indie sound. I don’t get the heavy Lana Del Ray appeal here though. She’s really just a manic pixie dream girl for sugar daddies.
6) Basundhara Dutta- STAR PAC
On the whole, pretty good stuff here. I appreciate the balance here with cheesy top 40 pop and some of the deeper RnB cuts. The playlist titles and descriptions show character and aren’t just grouped into the standard ‘good tunes’ category and plethora of playlists for 21sts, namely the one titled “The Guide to Making White Friends”. Nice mix of bangers, with a lovely smattering of RnB and Hip-Hop classics. While I very much like this profile, nothing really grabs me or impresses me beyond a strong appreciation.
5) Clarice Antero- STAR Environment Officer
From what I gather from your playlists is that the bulk of your listening is either Jazz, Classical or Showtunes. I very much appreciate the selection of Jazz music you have going on up here, very, very good. I might actually recommend it to people who want to get into jazz beyond “A Kind of Blue”. However, I am left wanting more. Specifically, more from the jazz and less from the Mamma Mia 2 Soundtrack.
4) Jacob Fowler- LAUNCH SOC
First off, I appreciate that you have some playlists for the months of this year gone by. I like that a lot. Shows dedication. For the most part, I think you listen to a very diverse and eclectic array of acts. Sure, you occasionally fall back on the indie-mainstream clichés, but who doesn’t. I also very much appreciate your smattering of Maroon 5’s classic album, Songs About Jane. I’m glad someone also shares my appreciation for it as an essential pop-rock album of the early 2000s. Your RnB playlist is a little basic, however.
3) Nick Brown- LEFT ACTION Gen. Sec
Some sprinkles of good shit here honestly. Vulfpeck, some classic Jazz/ Crooner stuff (Count Basie and Ella Fitzgerald), Jurassic 5, Hiatus Kaiyote and Grizzly Bear. Nice stuff actually. I don’t know, I couldn’t really fault your account. However, do you do follow a lot of promotional playlists for The Force Awakens.
2) Nitin Narula- LAUNCH PAC
Again, a very strong RnB and Hip-Hop presence here. I really, really love what music you have going on here. In fact, musically, you have, (dare I say it), the strongest collection in this whole list. A perfect balance between the mainstream bangers and some deeper, more underground cuts. My only major gripe is that your profile and playlists need some god damn curation. No one wants to go through a five-hundred and twenty song long playlist. No one. Sort that shit out. Other than that, very well done.
1) Mango S Moodley- LAUNCH Welfare
When I first saw this one, I knew it had to be number one. Moodley, you have the best selection of genre taste, deep cuts and certified classics. In addition to your listening habits, including none other than my girl Lauryn Hill, Berhana and SZA, I knew I had to give the number one title to you. Sure, your taste is a little (okay, A LOT) RnB and Hip Hop heavy, but we can’t love and regularly listen to ALL kinds of music. Your selections (while a little basic at times) are amazingly curated. This is the account of someone who respects the damn platform. I want this to be what aliens find as our records of music when we all die out. I just want to chat music with you and send some recommendations. My email is always open. Keep up the good work, and Moodley, you have my musical vote for number one.
Sophie Minissale | Music Editor
If you have thoughts of your own during election time send your thoughts to firstname.lastname@example.org