This is the guide to all the things that make up elections before BLACKOUT is lifted tonight. I thought a fun little framing device would be being the conductor of the GUILD HYPE TRAIN. Partly because it gave me the excuse to live out 9-year-old Josh’s dream job and partly to continue the theme of crude photoshops.

So, let’s get this train on the tracks! CHOO CHOO.


1st Station: Nomination Station

This stop is long. Like 11 days long. Nomination Station is lined with coffee stops which often feel like a revolving door. The excitement is building though as budding students are told they can be the change they see in the world. The odd thing about these coffee stations is they approach you, seems like an odd business model to me, but over 200 nominees says otherwise.

For a budding traveller this seems like the time to take stock of whether you feel up to the next few stations or whether your journey ends here.

EDITOR TIP: Use this to your advantage, potential free coffees are the life blood that gets you through your second semester.

2nd Station: Ballot Draw aka Hype Central Station

Right off the bat, seas of green and red flood into the Sue Boyd room. The Christmas vibe had really shown that we really meant business. Candidates eagerly awaiting to hear their names or prove their mettle to the Gods above. My vibe of Ballot Draw is two words. Hype. Central.

For about 30 minutes that is. By name 63 on the OGC the true malaise sets in, at which point we’ve quickly resort to golf claps. A far-cry from the whooping and hollering Conrad and Kate received for their 1/3 chance of first on the ballot paper.

I was left wondering was this malaise Gulveen Bandals’s fault? This editor sure hopes not, but the dramatic shift in tone made for a through disappointing mid-point on the Hype Train Express.

I was promised a journey of wonder and all I got was fucking golf claps. Would not recommend this stop unless you are a sadomasochist or like Christmas in August. Definitely check out the ballot list now the balls have been drawn.

EDITOR TIP: When visiting the ballot remember it is a marathon not a sprint, save up that enthusiasm for all 263 candidates.

3rd Station: Guild Elections Information Session

A very quiet affair, our representation made up one of 10 people in this desolate ruin. We would highly recommend this event for budding students keen to understand the rules and regulations parties are held to.

Hosted by the wonderful Mary Petrou and Tony Goodman, you are given a unique look behind the veil. Questions like; What has to make up a candidate flyer? How should we treat voters? What promotion can be done online? Are all discussed amongst campaign managers and a handful of keen voters.

The theme of this chat was harassment, or rather minimising it, essentially making sure you keen voters are not harangued into the voting booth like cattle to an abattoir. Remember if you don’t want to vote that is your choice, don’t let anyone force you into that position in two weeks’ time.

EDITOR TIP: Avoid the path, stray onto the grass. It’s a life-saver.

4th Station: Final Guild Council Meeting

This spot was interesting for three reasons:

  1. Tony Goodman reminds us we are the ‘Best Guild in Australia’. That gives this old conductor a sense of hope as we head into darker times. It also coincides with the Guild student body going into ‘hibernation’ to account for the election hype.
  2. The teaser trailer for some potential exciting policy positions – A certain crimson party may be interested in Bike Sharing after pushing a motion at last guild council meeting on a transport option paper.
  3. A little shout-out to consistent Pelican liker Ben Perry for chairing his first council meeting solo. Effortless chairing there Ben. (CORRECTION: This is Ben’s second stint as chair, sometimes the sequels are better than the original. We are all about admitting mistakes here in the Pelican House, so here’s looking at you Ben)

EDITOR TIP: There isn’t much to do here. Su’s Superstars is always a highlight of mine, the thing that keeps me back every time. Very wholesome content that makes my heart warm.

End of the line: Blackout

So that bring us to today’s stop, Blackout. With blackout comes the announcement of websites, Facebook pages, policy docs and DPs. Waves of green, red and the smattering of pink invade your social media. Then your lecture rooms. Then Reid. These are testing times for everyone, but don’t take it for granted. We will be by your side keeping you in the know.

Joshua Cahill | @joosh_cahill

Send your thoughts to pelican@guild.uwa.edu.au also check out all Guild Election content in the ’17 days of Guild’ tab